There was a time when intermarriage in China was socially discouraged, and interethnic and intercultural couples felt a lot of social pressure. Fortunately, those times are gone, and today, more and more Chinese women become Chinese mail order brides, i.e., intentionally start looking for a future husband abroad. But do such marriages work? How can one find a Chinese wife, and how much will it cost? That’s what we’re going to discuss in this guide.
P.S. Before start reading check out the best Chinese dating & mail order bride sites
Best Chinese dating sites
Who is a Chinese mail order bride?
There are many stereotypes about mail order brides from China, but they are rarely true. A typical Chinese bride you can find on specialized dating sites is a woman who wants to take an active position in dating and choose her potential partner. But what is so special about Chinese singles that so many western men are ready to overcome all cultural differences to start a family specifically with a Chinese wife?
Is a Chinese bride the right choice for you?
Should all men search for Chinese mail order brides to start a family? Of course, they shouldn’t—every person has their own expectations about a perfect partner, and a Chinese mail order wife will be a perfect partner for one man and not the best spouse for another. How to understand whether a Chinese girl will be a perfect girlfriend for you personally? Take a look at a few facts and draw your own conclusions.
- The surprising level of honesty. That’s one of the most important things that distinguishes Chinese ladies from other Asian ladies, for example, Thai girls—they are pretty straightforward and honest, and to some extent, it makes things so much easier for their partners.
- Devotion to a relationship along with control. Chinese girls, just like many other Asian women, are truly interested in finding a relationship and are devoted to their men after they stop being single. However, they also want a lot of attention and may be too controlling.
- Public displays of affection are discouraged, but only if they take place offline. Chinese girls are conservative in public and way less conservative in private. However, there are public displays of affection they like, and we’re talking about the cases where feelings are expressed on social media.
- Chinese women aren’t really into spontaneous things. Chinese girls are more into planning things, and that goes for almost everything, so if you’re going to date a Chinese woman, declaring your intentions is actually a good idea.
Chinese brides are attractive and family-minded, and that’s true. But you should also consider all the above-mentioned things before you join one of the websites with Asian brides or book your tickets to Beijing. If you think you have a pretty good chance to find a soulmate in China and wonder what Chinese mail order brides look like, take a look at the catalog below.
🇨🇳 Chinese Mail Order Bride Catalog
Why do women from China look for husbands abroad?
What exactly makes Chinese mail order brides join international dating websites and search for a foreign husband? People believe they know why girls from third-world countries do it (and often, it has nothing to do with reality), but in the case of China, the desire for a better life will hardly work as an explanation. If you want to know the real reasons, take a look at the list below:
- Social pressure. Unfortunately, Chinese women still feel a lot of pressure from their parents and even society at large and prefer to start families earlier. They often join mail order bride sites because they know that there, they’ll meet men who are ready to settle down.
- Desire to date a foreigner. Another reason is even simpler—dating a foreign man is considered to be prestigious as foreign guys are often viewed as more “masculine,” reliable, and successful overall.
- Desire for modernity. Western men are also often associated with modernity and equality in a relationship, and that also makes Chinese brides choose them over local guys.
- Impact of the Western culture. We shouldn’t also underestimate the impact of mass media, movie stars, and musicians—all that also makes Western men and even the idea of immigration more attractive in the eyes of Chinese mail order brides.
Consider the motivation of Chinese girls before you start looking for Chinese brides online. This information, along with an understanding of the main traits and characteristics of local women, will help you avoid disappointments of any kind. But what’s next? If you’re going to search for a Chinese mail order wife, you need to plan your budget, too.
How much does a Chinese mail order bride cost?
Of course, a man can’t pay a fixed amount of money for a Chinese mail order bride, but he can meet a Chinese mail order bride online, start a real relationship with her first online and then in real life, and marry her. How much will that cost? Here are some major expenses and approximate costs of services:
- Online dating expenses: $1,200 a year
- One week travel (tickets + hotel): $2,600
- Visa and documents: $1,200
- Wedding: $50 — 20,000
- Total: $5,000 — $25,000
Note these are the approximate costs—the final price “for a Chinese mail order wife” will depend on multiple factors, from the time you spend on a dating site to the number of your dates in real life. Still, if you make the right choices, it won’t cost you a fortune.
Try to calculate the cost of your mail order bride
❗ Note, to calculate the cost of a mail order bride from China, select the Asian region
Common myths about Chinese women
We think we know something about another nation, but it often turns out to be nothing but myths and, sometimes, pretty offensive ones. What are the most common stereotypes about Chinese brides that are utterly false? You can see them below.
❌ Myth #1. Chinese ladies don’t speak English
✅ BUSTED: In modern China, people who speak English well enough get a huge career boost, and it’s taught at schools as well as at universities, so most Chinese girls speak it, and the language barrier won’t be such a big problem.
❌ Myth #2. They’re always nervous about their work and pretty much everything
✅ BUSTED: It’s not true, either. Though Chinese women are more emotional than many people think they are, they know how to relax, and most can cope with difficulties without getting extremely anxious and nervous.
❌ Myth #3. Chinese mail order brides are very subordinate to men
✅ BUSTED: That was true some time ago, just in most other societies, including the Western ones. China is changing and evolving, too, and now women are more like partners and less like obedient wives.
❌ Myth #4. Chinese women are always modest and quiet
✅ BUSTED: As we’ve noted previously, they are actually pretty emotional—they know how to express themselves and how to defend their opinions, if necessary.
All in all, we recommend forgetting all the things you thought you knew about China, of course, not the historical or cultural ones but the things that you have ever heard from someone who heard them from the person they know—they often turn out to be nothing but common myths.
Facts about Chinese women
What else should you know about Chinese mail order brides? If you’re going to start a family with a Chinese wife, you should also consider the following:
- Many Chinese women just fail to find a suitable partner. China’s single population is expected to reach 400 million people, and women often note they would rather never get married than marry someone who doesn’t seem a good match to them.
- The average age of first marriage for women is around 27. Even though the social pressure is strong, most Chinese women prefer to graduate from universities before they get married, and well, as we’ve mentioned previously, they can be picky enough.
- Most Chinese girls want to have children. The fertility rate in China is even higher than in some countries of Western Europe—now, it’s 1.7 births per woman.
- Most Chinese women don’t mind dating older guys if the difference is acceptable. It’s very common for Chinese ladies to marry a man who’s 2-5 years older. A larger difference is less common, but some young Chinese ladies marry men who are 10+ years older than they are.
So, you have a good chance of meeting a pretty young Chinese mail order bride who’d be motivated to start a family and have children, of course, if you meet her expectations.
Pros and cons of dating Chinese women
If you still can’t make a decision, let’s sum everything up—take a look at the drawbacks and benefits of having a relationship with a Chinese mail order bride.
- Chinese women do want to have families
- Betrayal isn’t for them—Chinese brides are known as some of the most loyal women in the world
- Most Chinese ladies seeking a husband online are well-educated and employed
- They are devoted to a relationship and willing to please their partner
- Some Chinese women can be materialistic
- Language and cultural barriers matter
- You’ll marry her family, too
For many men, the pros are way more important than the cons. If you’re one of them, you’ll need some recommendations on how to find a Chinese bride online or offline.
How to find a Chinese bride?
Men who’d like to meet single Chinese ladies can search for them online or offline. Both options have their pros and cons, and in both cases, you’ll need a good strategy in order to succeed.
Meeting a Chinese woman online
There are pretty many places where you can meet Asian mail order brides or just single girls. Unfortunately, not all of them are safe, though, and you should also know how to use them effectively.
If you need a good algorithm to find legit Chinese mail order wives, just take the following steps:
- Find a reputable website with the right dating pool. Choose among multiple options, do background research, and make sure that the site can really connect you with Chinese brides you expect to meet.
- Learn everything about how the system works. Every online dating site, especially a mail order bride service, is a pretty complex ecosystem. Learn how it works, what the prices are for using different features, how members communicate, and then develop your own strategy.
- Create the best dating profile that will narrow the search for you. Provide your future Chinese bride with all the information she might need to understand that you are the one.
- Communicate using the best features to build emotional connections. There will be a lot of communication features, from live streams to video calls and texting. Use the best of them to find the right person sooner.
- Start dating a Chinese bride online. At a certain stage, a man declares his intentions, and if a Chinese bride is also interested in starting a relationship, they become a couple.
Then, a couple just schedules a date in real life in China or in a third, cheaper country to take a relationship to a new level.
Meeting a Chinese woman offline
If online dating is not for you, things get more complicated, but you can cope with difficulties if you take the following steps:
- Learn as much as possible about Chinese culture. That’s necessary if you’re going to spend much time in another culture and with people with other traditions, customs, and views of things.
- Choose the city you would like to live in. Consider multiple criteria, from the cost of living to the number of single Chinese women in this particular place.
- Decide how long you are ready to stay in China. It won’t take a week, so you should stay in the country for at least a few months or immigrate if you have a good remote job, like the culture, and/or have good career opportunities there.
- Find an apartment. You’d better do it before, not after you come to China.
- Decide where you’ll meet single Chinese ladies. Would you prefer to join one of the local or global online dating platforms or search for a partner online? Again, you need a strategy before you take such a serious step.
Yes, it will take more time and effort, plus it costs more money, but for some singles, it’s a chance not only to find a wife but also to change life completely and start a new chapter.
Success Stories with Chinese mail order brides
Jake has always been fascinated with Chinese culture and decided to try online dating after a messy breakup.
“I met Min a month in when I was ready to give the whole idea, but she captivated me with her beauty and smarts. Sure, we had some cultural clashes and language snafus, but after a few months, I knew I wanted to meet her in person before making any life-changing decisions. And one date in, I knew she was the one for me.”
Min explains that she wasn’t initially looking for a serious relationship, but Jake was persistent and charming, so unlike her past boyfriends. And while she’s still adjusting to her new life in the US, marrying Jake was the best decision of her life.
Yan admits she was the first to contact Kyle, though she didn’t have high hopes after a couple of unsuccessful online relationships with Americans. And Kyle admits he’d been chatting with a couple of potential Chinese wives online at the time, so he wasn’t too interested. But a few messages in, they realized they’d found their perfect match.
Despite the bumpy start and a lengthy online courting (the pandemic ruined any chances of meeting in person in 2020), Kyle and Yan are now happily married and ready to start a family. Kyle admits, “I almost ignored her first messages, but I’m happy I didn’t. I don’t know where I’d be right now without Yan by my side.”
How to avoid Chinese mail order bride scams?
Is dating one of the Chinese brides online safe? It largely depends on the choices that you make and the information you know. Below, we describe all the most common dating schemes—this knowledge will help you spot a scammer, make the right decisions, and as a result, protect your money and have a really great experience.
❗ Scam online dating websites with “Chinese mail order brides”
Not all dating sites are good sites, and some are initially created as scam platforms. There may be different schemes, but the main rule to follow is ‘If it sounds too good to be true, leave’. Don’t get us wrong—there are a lot of real Chinese brides who want to date foreigners, but they don’t create low-effort profiles, don’t steal some other’s photos (check them using the image search), and don’t message every new guy with an empty profile, and definitely don’t send all the same auto-generated messages.
❗ Fake Chinese mail order wife asking for money
If you meet a Chinese girl, and things are obviously moving too fast (she says she loves you despite knowing you for a week or less, shares all her secrets, wants to know yours, etc.), be careful. There’s a chance that one day she’ll say something really bad has happened to her or her family, and she needs your help (financial, of course) ASAP. If you send money, she’ll ask for more. Of course, you’ll never meet her in real life because she’s not a real Chinese bride.
❗ Personal and financial data scams
Here’s another important point to always keep in mind—sharing your data and even following the links that were sent to you by one of the Chinese brides is the worst idea ever. If you share your personal information or if it is leaked, it can be used to steal all money from your bank account, or these details can be used for blackmailing (so be careful with sexting, too).
Remember this information—it will help you avoid most kinds of threats when looking for a future Chinese wife online.
Our expert’s conclusion
Can modern men meet Chinese mail order brides online or offline? Yes, and it’s easier and even cheaper than many people think. All you need to do is to develop a good strategy, learn more about Chinese dating culture, set your priorities, and stay rational instead of making random emotional choices. If you do that, there’s a good chance you’ll end up marrying a Chinese girl in a few years or maybe even sooner.
No, you can not buy a Chinese wife. You also can’t buy a Korean or a Thai wife—the process you’re probably thinking about right now is called “international dating”, not “buying a foreign bride”. It’s very similar to online dating within the US: you will chat with a girl, call her, meet her, and propose to her after that. As you see, you don’t buy anything on any stage.
They are real. There are tens of thousands of women from China and Taiwan who are very interested in meeting a man from the United States. If you want to make sure you’re chatting with a real Chinese woman, focus on trusted dating sites and verified profiles.
No. American citizens can marry Chinese citizens both in China and in the United States. You can also bring your Chinese wife to the US. If your relationship is real, and you can provide enough evidence that objectively shows you have met your bride in person, the visa application will most likely not be rejected.
It’s pretty safe, especially if you choose trustworthy Chinese bride websites. However, you should follow safety rules to minimize risks. First, don’t send money to a foreign bride before you meet her in person. Second, don’t share your credit card number and a CVV code with other people. And third, always google the photos of the ladies you’re chatting with to make sure you’re talking to real people.